Chuck Norris CAN believe it’s not butter.
In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald’s in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized.
Chuck Norris doesn’t actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? …All of it.
Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn’t get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
Chuck Norris can’t finish a “color by numbers” because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
After drinking all night Chuck Norris doesn’t throw up he throws down.