There was a redneck who hit every black man he saw with his truck.

One day he saw a priest walking down the road and thought, “For all the bad things I done, let me give this priest a ride.”

So he picked the priest up and they drove along.

The redneck saw a black guy down the road and decided he would pretend to fall asleep and so the priest would think it was an accident. The redneck closed his eyes and heard a loud bang.

“What happened?” he asked. “You missed him,” the priest said, “but I got him with the door.”

A cowboy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks for a shot. Across the bar, a Mexican man is sitting and glaring at the cowboy.

The cowboy takes the shot and slams the shot glass down on the counter, yelling, “TGIF!”

The Mexican orders a shot, takes it, and slams his glass down, yelling, “SPIT!”

The cowboy looks over at him and notices the Mexican guy is still staring at him.

The cowboy once again orders a shot, slams it down, and yells again “TGIF!”

Once again, the Mexican orders a shot, slams it down after consuming it, and yells out, “SPIT!”

This goes on for a while, and the bartender stands puzzled and annoyed.

Finally, the bartender asks the cowboy, “Just checking, but do you know what TGIF means?” and the cowboy replies,

“Hell ya I know what it means, ‘Thank God It’s Friday!'” The bartender asks the Mexican guy, “Okay, so what does ‘SPIT’ mean?” and the Mexican replies, “Stupid Pendejo It’s Thursday!”

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and asks for a beer.

The bartender brings a beer and notices the parrot on his shoulder and says, “Hey that’s really neat. Where did you get it?”

The parrot responds, “In the jungle, there’s millions of them.”

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