Ek bar ek aadmi apni biwi ke sath bar mein betha hua tha.

Achanak hi pati ko toilet mein jana pada, itne mein ek lady uski patni ke paas aakar uske kaan mein boli

“Paise pehle le lena yeh aadmi baad mein lafda karta hai”

Patni ne apne pati se poochha: “Agar duniya 20 minutes mein khatam hone wali ho to tum sabse pehle kya karna chahoge?”

Pati: “Simple si baat hai sex karna chahunga”.

Patni: “Fir baaki ke 19 minutes kya karoge”?

Teacher ne kaha – Translate hindi to english, “khushi ke maare uski chhaati phool gai”.
Santa translated – “Due to happiness his chest turned in to breast”!!!

Ek sardar ki suhag raat thi, Sardar apni biwi ke peeche dalne laga to wo boli, na na sardar jee peeche nahi aage.
Sardar Bola – tumhein kaise pata hai.
Biwi Boli – Mera boy friend mere agay dalta tha
Sardar Bola – Achcha, par mera boy friend to mere peeche dalta tha.

Bus Conductor : Bachche ka full ticket lage ga!
Lady : Yeh to abhi nipple chusta hai!
Conductor : Woh to is ka baap bhi choosta hai, to kya uska bhi aadha logi?

Cream ke advt mein face dikhaya.
Soap ke advt mein Hath Dikhaya.
Shampoo ke advt mein Baal Dikhaye.
Par whisper ke advt main kuchh nahi dikhaya.
Jaago grahak jaago!

A biker walks into a yuppie bar. He orders a shot and a beer and drinks them down. Then he stands up, turns around and yells “All attorneys are assholes.” Well this one guy comes right up to him and says “You take that back right now!” The biker says “Why, are you an attorney?” He replies “No, I’m an asshole”

3 Girls having lunch.
1st said: I saw the condoms in boss drawer.
2nd said: I also saw & punchered them.
3rd Said: Haramzadi pehle batana tha na !!

Santa: In all AIDS ads, they talk of SAFE SEX.
What is SAFE SEX?
Banta: Oye, SAFE SEX is when wife is out of town!

Girl to boy: Shaadi k liye konsi date rakhien?
Boy: 22 December.
Girl: Koi khaas wajah?
Boy: haan, Saal ki sabse lambi raat isi date ko hoti hai.

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